The Great Beyond
by Aiddon Raziel Valentine
Summary: I'm breakin' through, I'm bendin' spoons, I'm keepin' flowers in full bloom, I'm lookin' for answers from the Great Beyond IchiOri
1. Track One

Liner notes: I love Bleach; it's my second favorite series behind Evangelion. The characters, the story, the emotions are all beautiful. I feel like I shouldn't be doing this since the series looks far from over and that I already have a backlog of projects. However, I'm not going to make this project long, maybe five chapters at the maximum.

There's a pairing I am particularly drawn to in the series: Ichigo and Orihime. I've been a fool for this pairing for awhile. To me, they seem tragic and Ichigo's anxious and grumpy nature conflicts with Orihime's bubbly, cheery personality. However, Orihime has a deep-rooted affection for him and even though the bloody fool is too thick to notice it, he still looks after Orihime. I know, it's just wishful thinking, but that's just me.

Anyway, here's my story and I should advise you that I'm going to be putting in a twist or two.

XXXXX

_We should not shed tears._

_for that will serve as a defeat of our bodies to our hearts_

_It is nothing more than proof_

_for it to be said that our hearts are things_

_beyond our ability to control_

_-Kubo Tite, Bleach Volume 7: Broken Coda_

Track One: Welcome to Paradise

Side A: Breaking the Girl

Arisawa Tatsuki sighed as she got into the elevator in the dorm house. Karate practice had worn her out greatly and the tournament was coming up soon. High school had been one thing, but the skill of the opponents she took on now was brutal. She was forced to get faster, tougher, stronger, and smarter to overtake these new foes. It was hard, but that's why she loved it.

The elevator bell rang and Tatsuki stepped out as she sighed and ruffled her short, messy hair. The fluorescent lights lit the hallway in that soft, gentle glow with the expense of that annoying humming sound. Her sneakers made a slight squeaking noise as she tread down the marble floor.

Tatsuki swung her keys on the keychain she had in a bored manner as she came to her apartment. Sticking the key in, she turned it and turned the knob to get inside. To her surprise, the place was dark. Odd, usually Orihime had the place bursting with light by now and had the television on for background noise.

"Orihime?" Tatsuki wondered as she set her keys down on the counter and turned on the lights.

No response, the hell? Normally Orihime was noisy from either her clumsiness or just her personality. The silence was freaky, like a tomb. Tatsuki slid open the door into Orihime's room. Tatsuki clearly saw auburn hair peeking out from a sheet.

"You sick, Orihime?"

Strangely, the girl did not answer. That was odd for Orihime not to speak whenever Tatsuki asked something. Maybe she was sick. Tatsuki sat on the futon and shook her friend slightly. Again, the girl did not respond.

Tatsuki raised an eyebrow and brushed away Orihime's bangs, looking at her face. Not surprisingly, the buxom girl had a smile on her sweet face. However, trails of tears were also staining her cheeks. Tatsuki smiled, thinking _Poor girl_. The tomboy brushed away the stains on her friend's cheek.

But then, Tatsuki noticed how very cold Orihime's skin was. And further more, the auburn-haired girl was whiter than the sheet she lay under.

"Ori…Orihime?" Tatsuki turned Orihime over far too easily. Orihime was still lying serenely on the futon, that curious smile still etched on her lips. Tatsuki swallowed nervously and noticed that Orihime's chest was not rising and falling as it should be.

Tatsuki's thin fingers pressed against the junction of the jaw line and the neck, checking for a pulse. Sadly, she found none. The vein did not beat its cord or pulse, it merely stayed. Orihime's heart would never rise again.

At first, disbelief hit Tatsuki. No, there was no goddamned way this could be happening; this happening to bright, cheerful Orihime suddenly? No, no way, no fucking way. However, a different sensation hit Tatsuki's gut like a sledgehammer and she clasped her hand over her mouth as she made a mad dash for the toilet.

Tatsuki lifted the lid up and emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet. However, she hadn't eaten since noon so all that came up was spit, bile, and acid. She vomited as badly as a drunk having too many drinks in one night. Mixed with the vile sounds were sobs for her dear, dear friend.

Tatsuki's throat clenched and nothing came up. Her mouth waited, but still nothing came. She lifted her head away from the toilet and sat against the wall, breathing hard and crying at the same time. Her sobs cracked her voice and she wept, by the gods she wept.

Please let this be a nightmare, please let it be a dream. Hell let it be some goddamned, fucking sick joke. But no, this was the worst. This was pure, raw, unforgiving reality.

Inoue Orihime…had died. It was as though her soul had fled her body of its own will. Nothing, not a mark, and an expression of neither pain nor sadness marked her countenance. Instead, there was that enigmatic smile. Why smile? Why smile when you were going to die?

Tatsuki breathed through her nostrils and swallowed, clenching her jaw and her eyes. Shakily, Tatsuki got to her feet. However, her legs were so weak that she was required to lean against the wall for support. Slowly, she walked to the living room where the phone was.

After what seemed like an age, Tatsuki came to her destination. She reluctantly picked up the receiver and looked at the numbers on it.

Tatsuki hesitated. She could see herself dialing the numbers, but her thumb didn't move. Dialing that number would truly make her admit what was real, that what lay not fifteen feet from her was real. The heavy feeling that had been sinking deep into Tatsuki's heart was sinking even deeper now.

She looked at the room where Orihime lie. Tatsuki's eyes turned glassy, but no tears fell. Tatsuki's tongue ran over her mouth in an attempt to moisten her lips but it was more of a nervous reaction. No, Orihime wouldn't want her to hesitate, not in the slightest. Slowly, Tatsuki pressed the buttons on the phone. It took her awhile, maybe about five minutes, but she still pressed them.

Tatsuki held the phone to her ear as waited as it rang on the other end.

"Emergency line, what's the emergency?" Tatsuki didn't answer as the woman spoke at the other end of the line. Tatsuki's eyes half-closed and she swallowed again. Saying things sure was easier than doing them.

"Hello?"

"Um…"

"What's the emergency?"

"My…My roommate's not breathing."

"Are you sure? Have you administered CPR?"

"There's…She's…She's as cold as ice." Tatsuki clenched the phone, threatening to crush it "And…her heart's not beating."

"Oh…Oh, I'm…I'm so sorry, ma'am."

"Look, send somebody over."

"Alright, give me your address and I'll send someone right away."

Tatsuki managed to choke out her apartment number over the phone before she hung up. She sighed in a melancholy tone and headed towards Orihime's room once again. This time was harder than the first due to her knowledge of things she sure as hell didn't want to know about. The door was like a gateway into a different world and Tatsuki hoped that once she stepped through it she would go back to her own place.

It didn't happen. Orihime was still lying on the futon, white as a sheet and with that cryptic smile on her face still. Tatsuki sat next to the futon and looked at Orihime. The buxom woman was so beautiful, like a rare flower not seen by mortal eyes. Even now, she was beautiful, like a doll with milky skin. But that in of itself was painful.

Tatsuki slid her hand towards Orihime's and clasped it gently. Orihime was still as cold as ice, but the skin was becoming warmer. Silent tears fell from Tatsuki's eyes and stained the sheet.

"Or…Orihime…I'm sorry." she whispered "I…I…You…You didn't deserve this."

Tatsuki wept and she did not let go, even when the ambulance came to take Orihime.

XXXXX

The ride hadn't been long at all, maybe five minutes at the most. However, that was only in the perspective of the world. To Tatsuki, it seemed like an eternity. Noises became dull and the colors of the world became nothing but a void. It was just Orihime and her in that world devoid of sound and sight. But it wouldn't be for long. Orihime was right there in front of Tatsuki, her hand being held, but her "self", her essence was long gone.

The ambulance unfortunately came to the hospital and the paramedics opened the doors to let in the cool night air. The two of them in their jumpsuits slid the gurney out of the ambulance and started towards the doors. Tatsuki still refused to let go, like her hand was attached to Orihime's.

The gurney was wheeled into a morgue and set in the middle of the room. Tatsuki still held onto Orihime's hand firmly. The cold, sterile room contrasted with Orihime, the bleak metal and colorless walls being things that didn't suit the girl at all. Not like this, not like this.

Tatsuki found a chair at an abandoned desk and pulled it up. She still stared at Orihime as though she expected her to jump up at any second. Tatsuki just stared and stared and stared. Her gaze was unfocused, her eyes appearing hollow.

Tatsuki's attention was so focused on her friend that she didn't notice the doors to the morgue opened and a young man wearing glasses enter. His highly polished shoes clacked on the stone and his glasses reflected the dim lights slightly.

"Here." the man offered a can to Tatsuki, which startled her. Tatsuki looked up at the man and immediately noticed his dark hair, blue eyes, and his rather plain fashion of dress.

"Ishida, right?" Tatsuki opened the can and sipped it. Oolong tea, she recognized the taste immediately. However, a slight bit of curiosity now turned to Ishida's sudden appearance.

"Why are you…?"

"My father is the director here and I'm also looking for an apprenticeship."

"Oh. But did you see me?"

Ishida adjusted his glasses using his middle finger as always and his expression was still that stoic one he always had.

"Yes, I wasn't as surprised as you as I was about Inoue-san."

Further conversation between the two was interrupted as someone entered. Judging by the scrubs, he had to be a mortician.

"Damn I hate these late-night shifts, don't you?" he asked Ishida.

"I don't mind. I can work on no sleep for days."

"Say that when you get to my age."

The man had a clipboard in one of his hands with forms on it. Tatsuki didn't know exactly what they were, but she had a pretty good idea.

"Inoue Orihime, age twenty, graduated from Karakura First High School. Parents unknown and her brother died eight years ago."

The mortician began putting on a pair of rubber gloves, making Tatsuki glare hard enough to kill lesser people or someone too dumb to notice.

"Could you go home until tomorr-?"

Tatsuki clenched her free hand so tightly that she dug her fingernails into her palm and the bloodlust she gave off was so intense that it even scared the hell out of Ishida.

"GET OUT NOW!"

Without a second thought, the mortician was soon running for his life away from one Arisawa Tatsuki. Tatsuki grit her teeth and sat down again as a fresh wave of sobs and tears came from her heart once more. Ishida felt awkward being around a crying young woman, especially one like Tatsuki who was as tough as nails.

"Arisawa-san…"

"It-it wasn't s'posed to be like this." Tatsuki clenched her eyes shut hard and crushed the can of tea she had. The contents spilled over and splattered onto the cold floor.

"Pardon?"

"Ori…Orihime wasn't supposed to go like that! She d-didn't deserve to leave all alone and in the dark." the can fell onto the floor "Sh-she was supposed to get married, have a mess of goofy, stubborn kids she'd spoil rotten, grow old and wrinkly and die with the one she loved." Tatsuki looked to Ishida, her tears pouring as freely as rain "N-n-not like this, not in some goddamned, steel room with some asshole wanting to cut her open like some slab of meat at the butchers. Not…not…oh God."

Incoherency claimed Tatsuki now and she lost herself to crying freely once again. Ishida was at a loss for words. This was not something he was used to, not in the slightest. However, doing something was better than just sitting down and watching.

"A-Arisawa-san, I'm sorry."

However, sometimes one has to be ready for quite the blowback. Tatsuki stood up and glared.

"Bullshit! Bull-fucking-shit you are! You didn't know her! You never talked to her like I did! Y-y-y…"

Tatsuki's knees failed her for the second time that night and she collapsed onto the cold floor. Ishida had a solemn expression on his face now and knelt next to Tatsuki who looked about ready to vomit again.

"Arisawa-san, how did Inoue-san die?"

Tatsuki still cried and managed to choke out a few words.

"A broken heart."

XXXXX

Beyond their knowledge, at least Tatsuki's anyway, was a spirit hanging near the young girl as Ishida attempted to consul Tatsuki. Orihime looked as she saw that the Chain of Fate was still attaching her to her body. However, a link somewhere in the middle of the chain snapped and severed the chain from Orihime.

The young woman picked up the length and examined it, sighing in a melancholy tone. There was no turning back now as the Chain of Fate was the ultimate decider of that. She smiled in a sad way and looked to her friends.

Yeah, she had wanted things this way, but looking at Tatsuki, looking at Ishida, and feeling her heart grow heavy made her think a bit. It was selfish, completely selfish. But, there was nothing to do about it now.

"Good evening." said a voice.

Orihime looked over her shoulder at a short, dark-haired woman in a black _shihakushou_ with a white Captain's jacket over it. Memories of the Soul Society came to Orihime without hesitation.

"Um…hi." the girl said nervously.

"You don't remember me, do you?"

"Wait, let me think." Orihime scratched her head "Well, I know you're a captain and a Shinigami. Sorry, I can't place a name."

The older woman gave a motherly smile.

"Unohana Retsu, captain of the fourth division. I remember you quite well, Inoue-san."

"You do?"

"Yes, I was most impressed with your healing ability. I swear, you must have had even more potential than Isane back then."

"Um, thanks."

Unohana noticed Orihime observing her friends and smiled as she always did. She set her sword on the ground and examined Orihime. Her eyes looked so sad and full of regret. It pained Unohana to see her like that.

"Are you here to take me to the Soul Society?" Orihime asked.

"Yes, but not in the usual sense."

"What?"

"I told you, your healing ability intrigued me and everyone else in the Fourth Division. In fact, we want to scout you."

"Scout me?"

"Yes, you're being offered a place at the Shinigami academy. We want to study your abilities and perhaps even give you a seat."

Orihime did that sad smile she always did. Unohana tilted her head.

"Is something wrong?" Unohana asked.

"Unohana-san…"

"Retsu, Unohana makes me sound like an old woman."

A sob came from Orihime and tears came from her eyes, though not as swiftly nor as passionately as they did from Tatsuki.

"Am…am I a bad person?"

"…"

"I…Tatsuki-chan is crying her heart out over me and Ishida-kun doesn't know what to do. And what about Sado-kun or Keigo or Kojima? I-I…I'm nothing but selfish. I should-"

Orihime's distress was stopped momentarily as Unohana took the girl's head and held it to her heart. The shinigami's dull heartbeat was heard.

"Shush, it's alright." Unohana cooed like a mother "You're a good person, you're a wonderful person. But…you're too kind, too selfless."

"Retsu…"

"Orihime-chan, sometimes…it's alright to be selfish. You're not selfish if you're worrying about those two and everyone else."

"Am I?" Orihime's voice was barely over a whisper. Her eyes were still glassy and tears still fell. She listened to Unohana's heartbeat for comfort.

"Yes, you deserve to be a bit selfish." Unohana tilted Orihime's head to look at her eyes "I mean, you wanted this, right?"

"Thank you, Retsu-san."

Unohana stood up and brought Orihime with her. The latter of the pair looked at Tatsuki and Ishida and etched a melancholy expression on her face. Unohana's hand rested on Orihime's shoulder.

"Orihime-chan, we have to go."

"I know, Retsu-san."

Retsu drew her Minazuki and stabbed it into the air. Empty space twisted and swirled, becoming a set of shoji that opened to reveal another set. Orihime took one last glance at Tatsuki.

"Good-bye, Tatsuki-chan, Ishida-kun."

And so Orihime left the mortal coil, entering the world of the Soul Society

XXXXX

Two weeks later

The funeral had been hard on everyone. Tatsuki spent the past fortnight at her parents' house since she couldn't stand being alone in her apartment. She wept throughout the entire wake and she couldn't bear to see the cremation.

Everyone they had known had shown up. Every person from their class had shown up, everyone from Ishida to Chizuru. Keigo and Chizuru wept dramatically while Chad and Ishida put on glum expressions and bowed their heads.

Everyone said their prayers as Orihime's ashes were laid to rest. It was slow as everyone did it one by one and then left. Soon, Tatsuki, Chad, and Ishida were the only ones left. Ishida clapped his hands and prayed silently. Tatsuki just stood and looked at the Inoue family grave, her eyes glassy.

"It's odd." Chad broke the silence "I always thought that Inoue would be the last of us to go."

"…Yeah, I always did, too."

"I guess we never really do know what life is gonna throw at us. One person I'm surprised that didn't show up is Ichigo."

"…" Tatsuki dug her nails into her hand so hard she drew blood. Ishida finished his prayer and looked at the distraught girl. These past two weeks contained hardly a moment where she wasn't upset and crying.

"Arisawa-san, what did you mean that night?"

"…Orihime's heart was broken, shattered and she lost the will to live."

"Did she have a lover?"

"No, she never had a boyfriend or a significant other."

"Then how did she…?"

"Ichigo." Chad suddenly said.

"Wh-what?"

"She had a crush on Ichigo for awhile, but he didn't see it."

"That bastard!" Tatsuki growled. The woman stomped the ground so hard it was liable to crack "That bastard just vanished without a single word, not to any of us. We could handle it, but it devastated Orihime. He meant so much to her, but he didn't give a goddamn."

Chad stepped forward, but Tatsuki's rather grievous aura was not something to be dealt with.

"Arisawa…Ichigo-"

"What? You gonna gimme some bullshit like "He had his reasons" or "He'd be here"? That's garbage! All she wanted to do was be with him, be by his side, even if he didn't feel a thing for her. That was her wish. I told her time and time again to forget about him, to hate him, but she couldn't bring herself to do that. And now, she's gone and she's not coming back."

"…I'm sorry."

"If I ever see that bastard, I will rip him to shreds and make him feel ten times the agony Orihime did."

"It's getting late." Ishida commented "I'll walk you home."

"Whatever just get me outta here."

The three said their farewells and left Orihime's grave as the sun set on Tokyo.

XXXXX

7:30 PM

Five figures walked up the hill towards the lone grave, two slightly shorter than the rest and one giving of an odd "clop" sound. The streetlights had come on and showed that the guests were the Kurosaki family, Urahara Kisuke, and Shihouin Yoruichi. All stopped in front of the grave and set incense in front. A blond girl kneeled.

"Urahara-san." she squeaked.

"What is it, Yuzu-chan?"

"How did she know Oniichan?"

"They…were through a lot together."

"Was she nice?"

"As sweet as you."

The sullen black-haired girl stepped up and prayed whilst standing. While Yuzu had been on the verge of tears, this girl's expression hadn't even changed. However, that appearance was just externally.

"Someone was really angry when they were here earlier." the girl closed her eyes "Oh, it was that one girl, Tatsuki."

"She always was an emotional one." commented the scruffy-chinned man standing next to Urahara "But any sort of anger is bad."

"She was angry at Ichi-nii."

"He's always pissing people off."

Urahara casually took off his hat and dusted it a bit. He didn't go to pray since he knew the truths of the world, but neither did Isshin or Yoruichi, who was in human form.

"She always…smiled." the olive-skinned woman commented "Like if she stopped smiling the world would end."

"Like Masaki." Isshin said in a melancholy tone "I think she would have been a good match for Ichigo."

"Yeah, she was a good kid, but she was too kind, too pure."

Urahara fiddled with his cane, observing the grave.

"Shinigami came the night she died, I think it was Retsu."

"Retsu? What did she want?" Isshin asked.

"Inoue-san had quite a powerful healing ability. It's cruel to capitalize on such a thing, but I guess it's better than Mayuri getting a hold of her."

"Yech, don't remind me."

Yuzu looked up at Urahara whose eyes were shadowed by his hat. Yoruichi was setting a pail of flowers in front of the grave, orchids.

"Um, Urahara-san." Yuzu squeaked.

"What, Yuzu-chan?"

"Oniichan is over there, right?"

"Yeah, what about it?"

"Will…Will he see Orihime over there?"

"Maybe."

"And…what about…" Yuzu bit her lip "Mommy?"

Urahara's eyes met Yuzu's whose looked for an answer. He sighed and lowered his head.

"Honestly, I don't know. Your mother wasn't a shinigami, so it'd be hard to find her."

"But…he wants to see her, right?"

"Maybe, but…it's hard to explain."

Yuzu's further questions were stopped when Isshin placed his large hand on her head. Isshin's expression was stone-faced, almost sad.

"To think that she wanted happiness so badly that she went to the Soul Society." Isshin mumbled "Why couldn't you just take her there?"

"Risking another gateway was out of the question. The last thing I need is her obliteration on my conscience."

"She did it as to not be rude." Yoruichi said out of the blue.

"Huh?" both men quipped.

A stray wind swept Yoruichi's tied back hair against the night, ebony striking against black. Yoruichi's amber eyes gazed at the men.

"If she just left, it would have been rude to everyone she knew. So she died instead, giving everyone who didn't know closure."

"Even if it makes others angry and sad?" Karin asked without looking at Yoruichi.

"They'll meet her again, someday." Yoruichi answered "Besides, the longer she stayed away from him, the more it ripped her apart. And…I think she wanted him to herself."

Karin looked at the grave and half-closed her eyes.

"…I feel sorry for her, having to go through that." she said "But why did she let herself feel that?"

"Alright, enough of the angsty stuff." Urahara interrupted "Inoue-san wouldn't want anyone to be sad. She's…She'll be happy."

Yoruichi swore she saw sadness in Urahara's eyes. Isshin smiled without losing the look he had in his eyes.

"I wish her luck and happiness with Ichigo." he said.

"Daddy?"

"Well, I can't give them my blessing in the normal sense. Bwahahaha!"

Urahara did his grin and began walking away. Everyone followed, one by one until the only sign they had been there were the flowers Yoruichi had brought.

XXXXX

Side B: I Just Want to See His Face

Twenty years later

The sun struck against the white buildings of the Soul Society, rebounding to create a rather bothersome effect that made almost everyone squint. Shinigami that had been out the night before were returning to their homes and going to bed while everyone else was getting up. At the edge of the Soul Society was the Thirteenth Division headquarters. Everyone there was getting ready for the day and the Vice Captain, Kotetsu Kiyone, was heading towards the captain's quarter which sat on a lake at the back. The surface of the water was like a mirror as it was calm.

Kiyone strolled casually to the front door and slid it open.

"Kurosaki-tai-."

"Over here."

Kiyone had gotten used to the fact that her captain could seemingly teleport without any sort of detection. His orange locks matched the rising sun's rays, but were lost to his odd, black coat that was like something a person would expect from someone from modern-day Tokyo. The sleekness of it oddly contrasted with Ichigo as well as the fact that is reached his ankle. His captain's jacket was clasped at his throat and trailed to his knees like a cloak.

Zangetsu jutted over Ichigo's shoulder, taller than he. Ichigo stood with his hands in his pants slits with the cuffs tucked into the heavy boots he wore, seemingly relaxed but tense as a coiled spring.

"You're always up early, Captain." Kiyone shook her head "I didn't know you came back."

"I snuck in while most of ya were sleeping."

"Yamamoto-sama kept you up?"

"Friggin' bureaucrats, it bores me."

The citrus-haired man scratched a scar on his face that was over his right eye and ran down to his chin. His tan eyes looked at his vice-captain.

"So, what's the four-one-one?"

"We're expected at the Academy to supervise."

"Damn babysitting. Can't they find a better use for us?"

"We're in times of peace. Besides, it's better than risking being killed by a Menos or worse."

"Bah."

Ichigo's coat and cloak swished as he walked away from his quarters, Kiyone following him. He hated doing this petty service jobs, but he wasn't a battle-hungry nutcase like Zaraki or useful at healing like Division Four. He silently admitted that Kiyone had a point that it was better than killing Menos by the dozen back in the day.

Ichigo responded with a nod as every single member of his unit bowed and addressed him by his official title. However, someone waiting at the door didn't; a Fourth Seat by the name of Kuchiki Rukia.

"Mornin' Rukia." Ichigo grumbled.

"Hey, you're early as always."

"More or less."

Rukia slid open the shoji and ushered Ichigo and Kiyone into the white environment known as the Seireitei. Walls as white as pearl stretched everywhere, making Ichigo squint his eyes.

"When does this thing start?" Ichigo asked Kiyone.

"About nine."

"Hmm, I guess we can walk, but the last thing I need to see is Zaraki."

"He couldn't find you if he had a map."

"Good point."

Ichigo flipped his captain's cloak over his shoulder and strolled casually through the Seireitei with the two women behind him. Shinigami bowed their heads humbly at the young captain's presence and gave lesser, but still respectful, gestures to the women.

The Soul Society had to change quite a bit after the war with Aizen all those years ago. Since three captains had left, they all needed to be replaced. Renji had taken the Fifth Division without question as he had already achieved Ban Kai and was without a doubt the most powerful Vice-Captain before being promoted. Rangiku had taken the Third Division after passing the test to do so. Most thought it was out of affection for Gin before he died.

The Ninth Division had been taken over by Shuuhei, though that was only recent as the Division itself had not officially had a Captain until then. The Twelfth Division had lost Mayuri back during the war for selling information to Aizen in exchange for test subjects. He was executed and his position given to Nemu who gladly accepted.

Recently, Yamamoto-taichou had retired, surprisingly placing his position to Shunsui who in turn placed his own the Nanao. Things were back on track until Ukitake passed away, which gave Ichigo his place.

Ichigo had arrived at the Soul Society for good twenty-two years ago. However, he refused to take any sort of position. He always said that being a captain wasn't something for him since he didn't like going through such large amounts of work and labor. He became a sort of reserve Shinigami for especially nasty Hollows due to his unique Ban Kai and that his Rei-atsu that surpassed even Zaraki's. After Ukitake died from his illness, Ichigo took his position out of honor.

Ichigo didn't exactly hate the Seireitei, but it wasn't like he held a lot of love for the place. It was alright. It was a bit plain, but it was okay. Only fleeting things were gone from the place: music, books, television, and those sorts of things. Things like that were quickly replaced and forgotten. But…there were things that could never be replaced and would be missed.

Ichigo had left behind more than a bit in that life he used to have decades ago. His father was a hassle and he knew Yuzu and Karin were strong enough to go on without him. Ishida understood as well as Chad, but it still sucked not having his friends around. He used to reassure himself that he'd meet them at some point in their afterlife, but even then it'd be ages until he saw them again. Ichigo became distant to the Shinigami in a way, not really considering them friends. He didn't mind, not at all.

The outer edges of the Seireitei gave way to the Academy, a huge establishment with constant classes and students. Some were the sons and daughters of the Nobles, others strays with some sort of skill with Kido. It was a strict, rigorous school where only the exceptional came out.

The size was large when compared to the colleges of Earth; several hundred-thousand. However, when considering that the entirety of the Soul Society had several billion denizens then…uh, yeah.

Ichigo didn't need to be asked who he was as the gates opened and eyes were already on him. Students murmured as they took notice of Ichigo's orange hair and his ostentatious sword.

"Geez, who the hell is that?"

"A Captain by that white garment. But that sword…"

"Izzat Kurosaki?"

"Shhh! Kurosaki-taichou."

"Holy-"

Ichigo rolled his eyes and just strolled into the Academy as classes were changing. The crammed halls helped him blend in and not be noticed, although Kiyone and Rukia were nearly lost amongst the sea of bodies. Ichigo just went on ahead until the two caught up, even if he had no idea of where the classroom was.

"Oi! Wait up!" Kiyone yelled amongst the tangle of bodies and limbs.

Ichigo just strolled as calmly as he always did, hearing his Vice-Captain's voice but not listening.

"Wait up!" Rukia came barreling out of the crowd and almost tackled Ichigo to the ground.

"What?"

"We're going to the sparring arena, not a classroom."

"Eh?"

"Mock Hollow-training. They need a captain in case things get out of hand."

"Tch." Ichigo ruffled his hair.

Times of peace might not or at least inactivity might keep deaths down, but they were boring as hell and made even captains of the Gotei Thirteen do normal errands such as supervision. It was garbage, but Ichigo supposed that it was better than getting claws stuck in your gut.

Rukia was the guide for the Academy as Ichigo never so much as set foot in the place and had only seen it from a distance. Interesting place since it was different from Ichigo's own education, but it was still basically a high school. Old-fashioned architecture was always neat to look at, but all in all there were classes and gossip and all that other crap.

"Oi, Ichigo." Rukia snapped.

Ichigo stopped his observations as Rukia lead them outside until they came to some sort of large, ominous gate. Ichigo's brow furrowed as he looked at the huge structure.

"The hell…?"

"The arena." Kiyone explained "They bring in low-level Hollows and have the students do a few attacks on them."

"And why are we needed if they're low-level Hollows?"

"Better safe than sorry."

"I'm gonna hate that line for the rest o' my life."

The door Rukia had opened to the outside a moment before was now flooding with students in white _haori_ and dark _hakama_. A older Shinigami was up front directing the students who were trying to look through the gate. Half of them looked eager, mostly guys who looked too hotheaded for their own good, while the other half, who were mostly girls and meek men, looked nervous and unsure. Ichigo just sighed and rolled his eyes, tapping Kiyone's shoulder.

"Wake me up if something that's actually interesting happens."

Kiyone just nodded while Ichigo just sat down in front of a wall and set Zangetsu on the ground. He hunched up his cloak and shadowed his eyes with it to shut out the light. The sounds of the world faded away and Ichigo was lost to his meditations.

XXXXX

A blank world, buildings with no signs and streets with no people is where two people were. Ichigo sat on the wall of a building, his eyes looking at the sky with graying clouds. Rain wasn't far off, but the clouds, bloated as they were, would not release.

"I thought I told you I hate rain." said a gravelly, gruff voice.

"I know and I hate it too."

Ichigo lay down, looking back as Zangetsu-ojiisan. The avatar was as grim as always and currently had his legs sticking through an open window while he sat on its sill. His amorphous, anamorphic coat whipped like a surrealist piece.

"Ichigo, you always let yourself be lonely."

"I'm not lonely."

"Running, even when I told you not to."

Zangetsu-ojiisan stood up and stepped towards Ichigo fluidly with his coat as wild as always. Ichigo paid no heed to him and kept staring at the gray clouds.

"You told me it rains here."

"Yeah, but only when you're sad."

Ichigo reached out towards the sky and seemed to attempt to grab the clouds that hung in the air. He kept his hand clenched as a fist.

"Has it rained here lately?"

"No, but it gets cloudy all the time. Clear days here are uncommon."

"Better than getting rained on."

"Wrong."

Ichigo sat up and turned his torso to look at Zangetsu-ojiisan under his glasses. The old man looked at the clouds with his expression not changing a bit.

"Rain here is awful, but day upon day of iron clouds is just as bad. Rain has some soothing nature, but this just aggravates and creates tension."

"Sorry."

"Stop it." Zangetsu-ojiisan struck Ichigo lightly with the back of his hand.

"What wazzat for?"

"You apologize too much. Whenever something happened when you believed it had to do with your power then you always apologized. Just whine, whine, whine."

Ichigo looked at the clouds again.

"What would happen here if I cried?"

"…That depends."

"Huh?"

"You might want to wake up and see what's happening."

XXXXX

Kiyone tapped Ichigo's shoulder to get him up. The orange-haired captain grumbled and stood to examine the situation. The gate was blown open and miniature craters littered the grass while a few students were being tended by Fourth Division Shinigami. Ichigo just shook his head.

"What happened?"

"The Hollow's restraints were broken by a student and the thing started making a mess of things. Rukia managed to subdue the thing, but not without it causing some damage first."

"Wait, a student was able to break restraints that strong?"

"Yeah, she surprised everyone. Unohana-taichou's talking with her right now."

"Mind explaining why a Captain is talking to a student?" Ichigo placed his hands on his hips.

"Apparently this one is so good she's been promised a place in the Fourth Division already."

Ichigo raised an eyebrow and examined the wreckage littering the place. Anyone in the Fourth Division was supposed to be a weak fighter, but to break Hollow-constraining bonds was amazing for anyone who was a student. Ichigo had to see this.

"I'll be right back."

Ichigo started towards the inside of the school where he felt Unohana's _reiatsu_ emanating from. Obviously this had to be important if a Captain was here as it was rare for Shinigami to talk to students until they graduated. Ichigo then heard voices.

"Look, you have to be careful in here. You're up against the sons and daughters of nobility."

"I know, Retsu-san."

"You may be talented, but you're an outside here even though you've helped us before."

"I know."

Ichigo had a feeling that Unohana smiled instead of sighing.

"Too kind as always. You and he are actually a lot alike."

"Really?'

"Yes, though he's gruff."

"Who's gruff?" Ichigo asked as he opened a shoji.

The person with Retsu squeaked and seemed to vanish. Ichigo furrowed his brow and saw someone feebly trying to hide behind Unohana's small frame. The older captain smiled.

"Kurosaki-taichou, we were just talking about you."

"Oh? And why?"

"How about I have her tell you?"

Unohana extricated herself from the student's grip and moved away. Ichigo raised his eyes as he saw who it was. Auburn hair, brown eyes, and a body that would turn the head of any man or Shinigami.

"Inoue?"

Orihime just blushed, looking down at the floor.

"Um, hi, Kurosaki-kun."

XXXXX

Liner notes: Yes, curse me for doing a cliffhanger and a rushed ending if you want, but keep in mind that I don't have to do this fic. This is actually going to be a three part ficlet since I can't think up much more than I have and I don't think I need to.

I personally think this was one of the best pieces of writing I've done in awhile, at least at the beginning of the chapter. It hurt to write about Orihime in that light, but I also wanted to do it. Don't expect much in the way of action, mostly just angst and drama.


	2. Track Two

Liner notes: So far this has been a sad piece of work, besides the part of Ichigo. I couldn't really stretch that scene out any further for some reason so I decided to cut it off there for the moment. Any complaining about OOC is a load of garbage. We all act OOC when we're upset or sad, and that's a fact. Plus I felt something when I was doing that scene earlier and that doesn't happen at all. Anyway, let's get this record rolling

XXXXX

_Any one time we throw away pride_

_we take a step closer to becoming beasts_

_Any one time we kill a heart_

_we take a step back from becoming beasts_

_-Kubo Tite, Bleach Volume 13: The Undead_

Track Two: In the Cold, Cold Night

Side A: Go With the Flow

Ichigo blinked a couple times whilst looking at Orihime. What was she doing here? Why in the world would Orihime be at the Shinigami Academy? Furthermore, why did she still look like she was in her twenties? Her long hair was partially clipped on the back of her head with the ends poking above while the rest cascaded down her torso past her waist. Ichigo had seen Orihime in a Shinigami uniform before and it was weird looking at her in it.

Orihime was still looking at Ichigo's _waraji_ to keep from looking at his eyes. Ichigo was Ichigo, but seeing someone after an age would make anyone nervous.

Ichigo wasn't exactly nervous, though he had that odd feeling in his gut. Somehow Orihime had slipped in under his radar and gone into the Soul Society. Damn it, what was happening?

"So, um, how have you been?" Orihime giggled.

"Forget about me, what are you doing here?"

"Um, I died."

Needless to say, Ichigo's eyes widened far more than what would be considered normal and sweat dripped down his chin.

"…Died?" Ichigo barely said.

"Uh, yeah."

"When?"

"I dunno, I lost track of time."

Ichigo felt angry for some reason but did his best to try to keep from looking angry. He let a breath out heavily from his nostrils like a bull and clenched his hand. His brown orbs roamed over to Unohana.

"Inoue."

"Yes, Kurosaki-kun?"

"You're dismissed."

Orihime's usual smile faded from her face and she replaced it with a submissive look. She knew Ichigo was angry, but at what she felt like it was everything. Looking down, she nodded.

"Yes, Kurosaki-kun."

Orihime walked out of the classroom, sliding the door closed as she did so. Ichigo waited until the footsteps faded into the distance before looking at Unohana once again whose face was expressionless. Ichigo didn't lose that intense face he always had.

"Well, you look angry." Unohana said plainly.

"What happened to Inoue?"

Unohana gave Ichigo a sideways glance and then looked at the window.

"What does it matter?"

Unohana saw Ichigo's hand slam into the wall next to her face. He did not look happy, but Unohana didn't change her expression.

"When someone asks you a question, you answer it."

Unohana tilted her head slightly and sighed, closing her eyes, and putting on a slightly hard expression.

"Kurosaki-taichou…"

Ichigo raised an eyebrow as Unohana mumbled his name and title. Then he felt a slight sting as Unohana's small hand struck Ichigo across the face.

"How dare you?" Unohana said with a level tone "How dare you ask things of me about that girl? You who never said good-bye to those he considered friends? You who just vanished and never even said a word about her? You can ask of me when you show actual concern."

Unohana left as Ichigo was still processing the fact that he just got slapped by the Fourth Division Captain. The sullen man brushed his cheek softly where Unohana had struck him and then looked at his fingers. His hand closed into a fist, but not tightly.

"Oi, Kurosaki-taichou." Kiyone said from the doorway "What was up with Unohana-taichou?"

Ichigo opened his fist and rested it by his side.

"Let's go."

"Oh, okay."

Ichigo had one last thought as he left: _Inoue_.

XXXXX

Unohana walked down the hallway of the Academy at a calm pace. Despite her demeanor, however, she was rather agitated inside.

_"That boy, he's so thick that it's surprising that he can even talk to people."_

"Retsu-san."

The older woman turned to see Orihime standing in an open doorway, her texts and such clutched at her chest. Her eyes were forlorn and Unohana had spent enough time with the girl to know what she was going to say.

"Don't speak, Orihime-chan, I know what you're going to say."

Unohana continued down the hall as Orihime half-shut her eyes.

"He…Retsu-san."

"What?"

"I'm…I'm alright."

Unohana stopped as Orihime's words came from her mouth. Sighing, the older woman glanced back at the younger one.

"What does he mean to you?"

Orihime blushed and looked down.

"R-Retsu-san."

"Well?"

Orihime just blushed further and glanced to the side.

"When…" Orihime swallowed "When I first heard of him, I was a bit intimidated." she remembered hearing about Kurosaki all those years back "But, when I saw him, I was a bit interested and when I looked into his eyes, I knew there was pain behind them. And when he saved me that one time, I was grateful."

Unohana fiddled with her sword, adjusting its _touju_ on her shoulder.

"I…I wanted to protect him, I wanted to repay him, I wanted to fight alongside him. But, even with all I had gained, I was weak, I was a burden. I nearly got myself killed and all I could do was watch."

Unohana tried to look at Orihime who was hiding her eyes.

"But I understood and I was glad when Kurosaki-kun was alive. But…I could never help him, I could never say "It's alright", I never heard his problems, and I never heard from him when he left. I cared for him, back then, but when he left…"

Orihime just swallowed.

"Do you love him?"

Orihime merely blushed and looked away from Unohana. The shorter woman leaned forward and then tilted her head upward to try and look into Orihime's eyes. However, Orihime was avoiding eye-contact at all times. Unohana just sighed.

"You're an odd one with odd tastes." Unohana chided.

"I know he's rough around the edges, but I can't help how I feel."

"No, I guess you can't."

The captain turned on her heel and began walking out. Thunder sounded over the horizon as she did so.

"It's going to rain." Orihime informed.

"About time; it's been boiling for days."

Orihime followed Unohana out.

XXXXX

Ichigo had dismissed Kiyone and Rukia a few minutes after getting away from the Academy and headed elsewhere on his own. He was heading towards Head Captain Shunsui's office.

Ichigo had been planning to visit Shunsui anyway for personal reasons. Now their meeting was going to be a bit loner due to the fact that's Ichigo had Orihime's sudden entrance on his mind.

Ichigo scratched his hair and realized his little error in that previous sentence. It couldn't have been early if Orihime looked so young; she couldn't be a day over twenty-one, if that. How could he have been so unaware? And…why did Orihime die?

Ichigo finally strolled up to the head office and slid open the door. The place was heavily unoccupied, except maybe for a Shinigami or two who were unseen. Soft snores were emanating from somewhere and Ichigo knew that Shunsui had to be in.

Ichigo was met by the smell of sakura as Shunsui always had a habit of littering the place with the pink flower petals. Ichigo scowled, not surprised that his lazy superior was sitting at his desk with his legs propped up onto it. His straw hat was covering his face and the chair he was on looked about ready to tip over. Ichigo promptly pushed Shunsui ever-so-slightly with his foot and the Head Captain noisily slammed right onto the floor.

"Mer, fuh, m'rning." he grumbled.

"It's almost noon, you idiot."

The Head Captain chuckled casually and put his chair back up on its feet and readjusted his hat. Ichigo just stood and crossed his arms in front of his chest. Shunsui smiled as he always did and Ichigo scowled.

"So, what's up?" the older man said casually.

"Inoue."

"Eh?"

"I saw Inoue at the Academy; how long has she been here?"

Shunsui sighed and rubbed his scruffy face. He knew Ichigo would one day walk through that door to ask that question, even if this had happened years ago. Shunsui poured a cup of tea. He slid it over to Ichigo's side of the desk.

"You and I may be here awhile so you might as well get comfortable."

"Just cut the chatter or any sort of emotional bullshit and just tell me how long Inoue has been in the Soul Society."

Shunsui just smirked and took the cup instead while Ichigo refused to sit. The tea was hot and steam wafted in front of Shunsui's face.

"One thing before I tell you: why exactly should I tell you?"

"Don't pull that same b.s. Unohana did with me a few minutes ago."

Shunsui's eyes shifted to look at Ichigo's past his straw hat.

"It's legitimate though. There's no need to talk about someone when the person asking doesn't really care about them."

"Just tell me, god damn it."

Shunsui saw that angry look Ichigo always did. Stalemate, that's what this was. Ichigo wasn't leaving without some form of an answer and Shunsui was unwilling to give it. However, Shunsui also knew that Ichigo was the most stubborn Captain in the entirety of the Gotei Thirteen and that he was also the most adamant. Shunsui sipped the tea he held.

"It was two years after you left the living world and came here." Shunsui began "It was surprising, to say the least, even if Unohana had her eye on Inoue when she was first seen."

"Two years? So Inoue couldn't have been over twenty."

"Yeah, she was going to college when it happened. Anyway, Yama-ji was a bit skeptical and he had Inoue subjected to a few tests and a bit of training. But, believe me it lasted awhile."

Ichigo raised an eyebrow at the sentence and fiddled with his jacket's cuff.

"How long?"

"About ten years, give or take."

Ichigo widened his eyes ever-so-slightly and fiddled with his cuff a bit more.

"Ten years?"

"Yeah, it was mostly because we couldn't find a way to contain and modify that power of hers. Nemu found out how and she has the_ zanpakutou _of it that Inoue's going to get."

"So, ten years, ten years and no one told me."

Shunsui saw how Ichigo's hand was clenching slightly.

"Why didn't anyone tell me?"

"You never asked."

"That's a poor excuse and you know it. Sometimes things still need to be said."

"Alright, it's because you never actually showed concern for the girl."

Ichigo relaxed a bit, perhaps confused at what Shunsui had said.

"What?"

"I don't remember you ever asking about anyone while you were here. All you did was your duties and not even really giving a second thought to anything. I don't think anyone, not even a Shinigami, should do that."

"You think you have the right to hold that from me on account of that!"

Shunsui looked up at Ichigo and gave the younger man a glare.

"Do you think you have the right to ask me about Inoue when you haven't given as much as a passing thought about her?"

Shunsui finished his tea and set the cup down. Ichigo just leaned against the wall, knowing he had been beaten in the argument. He just looked away from Shunsui.

"What about that thing I told you to look into?"

Shunsui actually began doing something; paperwork.

"What about it?"

"Well?"

Shunsui gave Ichigo a glance.

"I still haven't found it yet. I'm close though, but…"

Suddenly, Ichigo set his hands firmly on the desk and looked Shunsui right in the eyes.

"Please, I need this."

Ichigo's eyes had a different look in them, one of pleading. It wasn't something seen often, and it wasn't something Ichigo liked to do. Shunsui swallowed slightly and sighed.

"Alright, I'll look."

"Thanks."

Ichigo slid open the door and saw that the clouds were becoming iron-gray with moisture. Thunder sounded and split across the sky.

"Feels like it's gonna be big."

XXXXX

Side B: I'm Feeling This

Orihime sat amongst the trees outside the academy, her hands resting on her lap. A large tree shaded her and cast a shadow on her. Her head was sunken, her chin almost touching where her neck met her chest.

She hadn't been ready for today, not at all. She screwed up again and made Ichigo mad. She had even made Unohana mad at Ichigo. The wind blew slightly and made her hair whip to the side a bit. She swallowed and looked sullen.

Didn't anyone understand? She chose this, she wanted this, she…she just wanted to be by him. It didn't matter if he thought about her, it didn't even matter if he thought of her as a friend. To be by his side, that's all she wanted.

Orihime blinked and hugged her legs to her chest, burying her mouth into her knees. But…what if it wasn't enough? His memory hadn't been enough for the living world and that's how she had ended up in the Soul Society. She wanted more than to be liked by Ichigo, she wanted…

Orihime blushed deeply at those thoughts. Going deep like that, going that far with someone was always a risk due to how hurt a person could get. But…if…if…pain of that magnitude was possible, wasn't joy also possible? To be by him, to have an argument and make peace afterwards, ups and downs, blacks and whites and shades of grays, wasn't that worth it? Even if it only happened for a brief time, wasn't a bit of happiness worth all that pain?

Orihime heard thunder sound again and stood, knowing that she should get back to her dormitory. However, she hesitated when went to reach for her umbrella. One chance, one moment, one word, that's all anyone was ever given. What had she come here for; a consolation, something that wasn't her heaven?

"Tatsuki-chan…" a tear trickled down Orihime's face.

How many times had Tatsuki told her? How many times before Ichigo disappeared? Fleeting, passing, temporary, nothing was for sure. To think that he would have stayed forever was naïve, an illusion. Orihime thought.

"I have…I've hesitated too long, I've always hesitated. And…that day he left, I had already made up my mind about my future. I want…I want…I want to tell him. I want this to be something more than one-sided sympathy. Tatsuki…I'm alright."

Orihime grabbed her umbrella and felt around, trying to lock on to something. She could sense Ichigo and knew that he was quite a distance. But…he was worth it. ggrabbing her things, Orihime went into a sprint to intercept Ichigo.

XXXXX

Ichigo had wandered since his little talk with Shunsui and really couldn't care less if he got rained on or not. Since everyone had a tendency to run into their homes and shelter themselves from the downpour, then it was a lot easier to think. Everything was quiet except for the dull roar of raindrops and everything turned to glass.

Thunder sounded and the atmosphere was rapidly becoming cooler, plummeting like a rock. Ichigo thought about Orihime, still shocked that the girl had died twenty years ago. He ruffled his orange hair and thought a bit more. He hadn't really understood Shunsui and Unohana's answers to his questions. Half the reason he had left was to keep his friends out of danger. At least here he couldn't worry about them being hurt by powerful Hollows.

But, that was such a lame answer. That was just an excuse to run, an excuse to escape concern. Anyone could run, anyone could flee. Turning back will turn you old, cowardice will cause you death. Ichigo remembered those words, and he still wasn't listening to him.

Inoue, why did she come here? Accident-prone as she was, Inoue wouldn't die of such things. She had taken worse blows from Hollows, proving she was tougher than she looked. She also had Chad and Ishida who were competent. Disease; no way. Something else, something different.

Thoughts were obliterated as a sheet of rain sprayed across the structures and made everything wet as a bathhouse. Ichigo was soaked in an instant and his hair plastered to his forehead. He looked up as the rain came down and groaned.

"I hate rain."

"Then get somewhere dry."

Ichigo tilted his hair down and saw Orihime standing about ten feet in front of him with an umbrella in her hands. Not a hair on her head was even the slightest bit wet and the cuffs of her pants were the same way.

"It's a long way to your place, right?" she asked.

"I'll be fine."

"You hate rain, I know you do. Let me keep you dry."

Ichigo grunted and then sighed.

"Thanks."

Orihime raised her umbrella a bit higher to accommodate Ichigo as he ducked under the bamboo implement. Orihime smiled like she always did and Ichigo nodded his head slightly.

Ichigo walked slowly and Orihime with him. This was really awkward, really, really awkward. He should have asked Orihime in the first place, but saying and doing were two very different things. Ichigo swore he could hear Orihime humming something slightly above the sound of the rain.

Ichigo ruffled his hair, thinking what he was doing was kind of stupid. He was wet anyway, so why the hell did he duck under Inoue's umbrella? Maybe it was because he could withstand the rain less. Or maybe, it was because of Inoue.

"So, how long till you graduate?" he asked casually.

"I just need to take the last exam and I'm done. Retsu-san is trying to push for me to get a seat."

Ichigo bit his lip, smacking himself internally for not asking what he wanted to. He breathed outward.

"Inoue…"

"What? Kurosaki-kun?"

"How did you die?"

Orihime stopped in her tracks, Ichigo nearly stepping out from under the umbrella because of it. He raised an eyebrow and noticed how Orihime was fiddling with her finger.

"If you don't wanna talk about it, then you don't have to."

"No, no, I…I want to."

Orihime swallowed and blushed heavily, her throat clenching. He had asked, so it was okay, right?

"After…"

Orihime barely got out the first word, so much that she wasn't so sure that Ichigo had heard her. She started again.

"After you left, I did what most people thought normal. But, it felt empty, unfulfilling, and fleeting. I was never really happy and one day, I made a choice."

"A choice?"

"To choose a life in the living world, with my friends and lie to myself or to come here."

"But you haven't said what you died of."

"A broken heart, I died for you."

Ichigo wasn't sure of what she had said and just stared.

"What did you say?"

Orihime had dropped the umbrella a few moments before and now her long hair was plastered to her back. Despite the fact that she was covered in rain, Ichigo could see a tear running down her face.

"I chose you. I died, because I chose you."

Ichigo stared even more and blinked. He was the reason Orihime died? He killed her? He…he killed her? Ichigo had never been brought to his knees before because of a sentence and now that truth was completely false. He…he…

"Kurosaki-kun?"

"I…"

He fainted.

XXXXX

In Ichigo's inner world, white buildings had rain coming down on them like the clouds were weeping and Ichigo alone as he sat on the side of a wall. He had never been in his inner world whenever it was raining and he could see why. It was horrible; it was his picture of hell. The rain was so thick that light was blocked out and was cold as ice.

Ichigo kept repeating those words in his head over and over again. _Died because of you, died because of you, died because of you!_ Those words hurt like hell, like being stabbed with a _zanpakutou_ a billion times and never dying. It hurt like hell and did he ever keep stabbing that torch to his soul.

The rain came down endlessly, torrents pouring as though they were trying to sink the world. Ichigo sat numbly on the side of a building and let the water chill him to the bone. He clenched his hands into fists, gripping his legs tightly.

Ichigo didn't hear footsteps behind him due to the severe shower and hardly felt a sharp blow to the side of his head that sent him skidding across the wall he sat on. However, Ichigo made no attempt to get up even when he stopped and just lay to rest against the cold stone. Zangetsu's heavy boots clopped against the wall as he examined Ichigo.

"Why do you lay there?"

"…Because I did something awful."

"You're such a fool. Instead of going head-on you're dwelling here trying to act as though you're redeeming yourself for a sin."

Ichigo propped himself up on his elbow and just looked at the drops rippling the water already on the wall.

"I killed her, _me_, I killed Inoue."

"Her? No, she died, you had no hand in it."

"Bullshit! She said it herself, she died because of me!

Zangetsu looked towards the pitch-black sky and sighed. The avatar ran his hand through his thoroughly soaked hair and sent a wave of drops to the wall.

"This is what happens when you cry." he said "This is a typhoon, not just rain. When you cry, when you torture yourself, it storms."

"So what?"

Ichigo was brought to his feet by Zangetsu's powerful hand and then had his coat grabbed by the same hand.

"This solves nothing. Just moping, killing yourself solves nothing."

"But I killed her! I fucking killed her!"

"Fool."

Zangetsu roughly shoved Ichigo away.

"If you dare put yourself in pain then that girl will be in ten times the pain you put yourself in."

"I deserve this."

Ichigo sunk to his knees, not even trying to rise again. His head was lowered in shame and his eyes looked dead. His arms hung limply at his side and Zangetsu observed him.

Zangetsu had seen Ichigo in a number of positions. He had seen him angry, determined, confident, sad, but never completely devastated and just attacking himself at all angles. No matter what anyone said, it wouldn't help.

"Coward."

He was.

"Fool."

Yeah.

"You didn't even listen."

Huh? What did he say?

Zangetsu walked over to Ichigo and crouched in front of him. Their eyes met and Ichigo became attentive.

"Do you honestly think that sitting there and beating yourself up will solve anything?"

"No."

Zangetsu slide his wet bangs across his forehead.

"A person who fears what may come is a fool who walks towards self-destruction."

"So?'

The avatar's hefty hand dealt Ichigo a sharp blow to the back of his skull.

"Inoue would be sad. And that is by far the worst thing you could do."

Zangetsu stood and looked down at his partner. Ichigo began clenching his hands so hard that his nails began digging in and drawing blood. Zangetsu blinked his eyes.

"Walk forward and do not stray or else you drop into an endless hell."

XXXXX

Ichigo felt warm covers over his body and heard the rain still going on outside. He blinked his eyes a couple of times in the low light and groaned. It seemed that Zangetsu had kicked him out of his inner world and back into the Soul Society.

Ichigo flopped back down onto the floor and just stared at the ceiling for awhile and listened to the soft patter of the rain on the roof. God those sounds were annoying. They were like a billion needles tapping on a tabletop. It was aggravating.

The young captain thought for a bit with the rain in the background. He turned on his side and looked at his door. His mind told him so stay, but his legs were still pushing his body up and then carrying him towards the door. His mind screamed for him to go back, but still he didn't listen.

Ichigo slid open his door and saw that it was raining on his walkway to the Division base. He just leaned the doorjamb and looked at the horizon that was now as gray as steel. God, how long had he been out?

"Kurosaki-taichou."

Ichigo gave a sideways glance to Kiyone who was across the walkway in the Thirteenth Division building. Ichigo sighed.

"Are you alright, sir?' Kiyone asked.

"Yeah, how long was I out?"

"About seven hours."

"How'd I get here?"

"Actually, Inoue-san carried you here on her back."

"Is she alright?"

"Yeah, she's in the dormitories fast asleep."

Ichigo walked past Kiyone in a flash and was already going down the hall to the dormitories. Kiyone raised her eyebrows and then shrugged as she was already used to her superior's odd behavior at times.

Ichigo walked at a brisk pace down the hall. Orihime just had to be a fool and drag him home. Why was she so willing to go to such lengths for people? Why was she so kind? She had never gotten angry and always had the outward appearance of a ditzy woman just so others wouldn't worry. Damn it, always too kind.

Ichigo walked up a set of stairs, getting a couple of nods from some rookies while he was at it. All the time, he thought of Orihime. He never remembered her thinking about herself and he never recalled Orihime even once being selfish or apathetic. She was too pure, too king, too forgiving.

The familiar sensation of Orihime's reiatsu came from room and Ichigo stopped dead in his tracks. His eyes glanced down the hall and he stood there for awhile. However, Orihime was at the room right next to him which somehow felt a million miles away. Ichigo's hand slid to the door and he hesitated for a bit.

"I'll walk that path."

Ichigo slid the _shoji _open and saw Orihime's head poking from under sheets. Ichigo slowly stepped forward and sat next to her, observing her form. She was turned on her side so he couldn't see her well.

She looked happy, seeing that small smile amongst the dark. Ichigo just scowled since Orihime wouldn't look depressed no matter what. He inched next to her ear and swallowed.

"Inoue…"

"Yes, Kurosaki-kun?"

Ichigo jumped as he saw Orihime's brown eyes open and look at him. The girl didn't look like she had just woken up and gave Ichigo a smile.

"How long have you been awake?" he asked.

"About an hour. I was going to leave, but I knew you'd come here. You always have a habit of apologizing for nothing."

Over not…what the hell was Inoue smoking?

"But you said I killed you."

"No, I said I died for you."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"I wanted to see you and be next to you."

Ichigo's eyes widened and he wasn't sure of what to say. Swallowing, he continued.

"But…but you were miserable, you died because of what I did. What if I did worse? What if I hurt you again?"

The next sentence that Ichigo heard would be burned into his mind for as long as he existed.

"Then hurt me."

"?...?...? What?"

Orihime scooted over to Ichigo and rested her head on his chest.

"Beat me, stab me, defile me, I don't care. As long as I'm next to you, as long as I'm with you, as long as it's you…I'll be okay with it."

God, did she even have a mind to lose? No sane person would say something like that. Ichigo felt her shift on his chest and meet his eyes.

"Kurosaki-kun, we have a lot to talk about."

XXXXX

Liner notes: Hectic chapter and one that almost quite literally made me weep at times because of the dialogue I had to write for Ichigo and Orihime. I was expecting this to be longer and I feel that the ending was a bit anti-climactic as well. I also noticed that a few lines Orihime says to Retsu almost exactly copy Ayanami Rei's "hold your hand" speech in the eighth volume of the Eva manga. Still good in my opinion though. Maybe I shouldn't play REM when I'm doing emotionally intense scenes like that.

Orihime's dialogue is almost completely self-sacrificing in that last line. That is the epitome of devotion in my eyes. Say what you will, but any woman who says something like that and means it then they're too loving for their own good. She's willing to give up and sacrifice that much for someone who means so much to her. Next chapter will be the last.


	3. Track Three

Liner notes: This was actually supposed to be a one-shot story about Orihime and Ichigo. In many ways it still is, just divided and very long. Believe it or not, this work was actually completely done prior to its release and then released periodically.

In the way of plot, this story is unremarkable since there are no surprises and everything pretty much repeats itself over and over again. It's more like a song without notes. However, when something I do emotionally affects me, almost making me shed tears which in fact I haven't done for years, then…it's something more than just writing. But still, I always held those tears back, I never let them fall. Even in all the years I've lived, I don't remember ever shedding a tear. Anyway, let's get this record rolling.

XXXXX

_If I were the rain_

_could I connect with someone's heart?_

_just as it can unite_

_theeternally separated earth and sky?_

-_Kubo Tite Bleach Volume 3: Memories in the Rain_

Track Three: Come As You Are

Side A: Sweet Emotion

Rain still poured outside like it had been for hours. Everyone was inside except for the few Shinigami patrolling the streets. Trillions of droplets fell onto the Seireitei until it was soaked beyond compare.

But people were completely dry in their homes. Their shelters kept the rain away and its cold from piercing their skin to the bone. But sometimes the rain's cold can get in even if someone closes the doors and the windows.

Ichigo had come to rest on Orihime's chest, right on her heart. His right ear was pressed onto her clothes and he didn't move an inch. Orihime just held Ichigo, one arm resting above the small of his back and the other having its hand in his orange locks, stroking them gently.

Ichigo just blinked a few times and stared blankly at the window that had rain running down it. Odd patterns were cast on the floor because of the rain and were unwatched as the boy and the girl just lay comfortably.

"Why…" Ichigo said after the silence that had been in the room for the better part of an hour.

Orihime's eyes looked down at Ichigo, observing him even though he hadn't moved in the slightest. Ichigo cleared his throat because of his voice cracking.

"Why didn't you blame me for anything?"

Orihime continued to scratch Ichigo's head gently, tickling his scalp. She looked at him through her long eyelashes.

"There was nothing to blame you for." she answered after a minute of thought.

Ichigo looked upward towards Orihime's neck which was the closest he could get to her eyes without straining his own.

"Why don't you hate me?"

Again Orihime took her time to answer. Then again, it wasn't like they were in any sort of hurry. Hell, they had eternity to talk things through.

"Does a person who hates actually someone who could ever love? I mean, ever _really _love, love so much that it hurts?"

Ichigo closed his eyes for a moment.

"No, I guess not."

He craned his neck so he could look Orihime in the eyes.

"But why didn't you?"

Orihime closed her eyes in a contemplative manner like she was trying to find an answer. It came, but as something rather cryptic.

"People you like, people you love, you can't ever hate them, no matter how much you think you want to. And…when you try to, you feel awful and guilty. If I ever hated someone, _really _hated someone, I don't think I could forgive myself."

"You're too damn kind."

"So are you."

Ichigo made an odd noise that seemed to be a poor excuse for a chuckle and listened to Orihime's heart beating calmly: THA-THUMP, THA-THUMP, THA-THUMP. It almost sounded like it was anxious for something. No, it had been anxious for a long time. Ichigo lowered his eyes slightly.

"Why didn't you move on? Why didn't you forget me?"

Orihime sighed and licked her dry lips. However, no answer came forth from her mouth. She just scratched Ichigo's head and breathed for awhile. Ichigo's head rose as Orihime's chest did the same from her breathing. Silence dominated the room for several minutes with only the rain as noise.

Ichigo's heart was beating faster as was Orihime's. Ichigo knew the answer couldn't be bad, but his heart beat as it did.

"Because…I wanted that pain."

Ichigo propped himself up on his forearm to get a better look at Orihime. She was looking away for some reason.

"Orihime." the buxom girl perked up immediately at Ichigo's use of her first name "What do you mean?"

Orihime blushed and breathed out to calm herself.

"Because…there was no room to anyone else after I chose you. I wanted to remember every little bit of you, but whenever I did, there was pain."

Ichigo looked like he was about to say something, but stopped.

"But if that pain was all that could connect me with you, the only thing that could bind me to you, then I was happy."

"But…"

"Shhh…" Orihime placed her index finger to Ichigo's lips "I'm not done.'

Ichigo was about to say something else, but his gentlemanly side forced him to do otherwise.

"But that's what I thought back then. After awhile…I craved more."

Ichigo suddenly noticed that Orihime had taken on a bit more of a…seductive look. She turned him onto his back and cupped his face with her slender hands.

"I wanted to see you…Hear your voice…Touch you…" she stroked his slightly rough face "Smell your scent…" she sniffed him "And even…"

Ichigo took note of the fact that Orihime had bent her torso more to come closer to him. She was so close that her auburn hair was tickling his face. However, Ichigo's attention was most given to the fact that Orihime's lips were almost touching his own.

"Taste your flavor."

Suddenly Ichigo's eyes widened to about three times their original size and his heart started racing like a jackhammer.

"I…came here wanting to give you what wasn't yours. My body…my soul…my life. I wanted to give you anything you wanted."

"But I never wanted you to do that."

"_I _wanted to do it. My heart was already yours, but I was willing to give you everything else."

Orihime pulled her head away from Ichigo's to give him some breathing room as he looked like he was about to go berserk. Orihime rested her back against the wall and looked at Ichigo.

"Now it's your turn." she stated plainly.

"Alright."

"Why did you leave?"

Simple questions were always the hardest to answer, mostly because they were always so broad and a billion answers could be given. All were answers, but never a complete answer. Ichigo felt himself sweat a bit, bracing for the reaction.

"Because…I..."

Damn it, in the little over twenty years he had been in the Soul Society, Ichigo had never dwelled on this thought. Hell, even he didn't know why he left all those years ago. Screw it, the last sentence was an answer.

"I don't know."

Orihime tilted her head.

"Then what did you feel?"

"A desire to flee, a desire to run."

Ichigo bowed his head shamefully.

"And I don't even have something that I was running from. Maybe I just ran because I could, maybe I did it because I couldn't stand a buncha petty things, I just don't know!"

Despite Ichigo raising his voice, Orihime did not flinch. She scooted towards him and embraced him again, his head over her heart.

"Alright, alright, that's all."

"But…"

"Even if you ran, I caught you. I'm right here, so you don't need to be sad and you don't need to be scared."

Ichigo lowered his eyelids again and rested for a moment. He had one more query.

"Why me?" he asked.

Orihime smiled slightly and stroked Ichigo's hair. Ichigo swore he heard a chuckle coming from Orihime's chest.

"Because you're you."

"That makes no sense."

Orihime giggled which made Ichigo think she was making fun of him.

"Because you care, because you're kind, because you're honest, because you hate it when people get hurt, because…because it's all the reason I need."

Alright, that sort of made sense, even if it was Orihime-sense. Because he was who he was and that was all that mattered.

Neither Ichigo nor Orihime moved again for a few moments. Ichigo was probably the one least reluctant to move. He had gotten quite used to hearing Orihime's heart. It was…soothing.

"This is nice."

"What is?"

"This, just sitting here right next to your heart."

Orihime smiled but also seemingly squeaked when she felt Ichigo's arms slide to her thighs.

"My mother did this to calm me when I was a kid."

"She did?"

"Yeah, I loved it."

"What was she like?"

Ichigo smirked.

"A lot like you actually. You would've liked her."

He closed his eyes.

"She always smiled, was always kind, warm, and…"

"Have you visited her?"

Ichigo gave no answer except to wrap his arms around Orihime's waist.

"Kurosaki-kun?"

Sobs were heard and Orihime saw tears forming on Ichigo's eyes. Had Orihime known that Ichigo had not cried since his mother died, it would've made her heart skipped a few beats.

"Thank you, Orihime."

Orihime just smiled and held Ichigo to her heart.

"You're welcome, Ichigo."

XXXXX

Side B: Stairway to Heaven

Mornings after storms have a tendency to make everything look refreshed and clean. The air is crisp, the breeze cool, and the streets clean. Rain isn't always so bad because it shows something nice after it's gone.

However, Kiyone still had to do her little ritual of waking up her Captain only to be tricked into seeing that he had been behind her the whole time. She walked down the hall and eventually onto the walkway to Ichigo's room.

"Kurosaki-taichou." she said as she slid open the door.

No answer as always. No, it wasn't like always. Usually Kurosaki was behind her by now and gave her the same answer. Odd, where was he?

Kurosaki-taichou never left early without telling Kiyone and it wasn't like he took early-morning walks. Unless…yeah, that was a possibility.

Kiyone had remembered that her Captain had gone to the dormitories last night so maybe he was still there. But why exactly would he still be there? Maybe he and that girl had something wild happen the night before.

Kiyone blushed at such a thought and continued up the stairs to the dormitories. She slid the shoji open and then saw the sight of Orihime being held from behind by Ichigo while both of them lay under the covers of a futon. Blushing madly, Kiyone bowed faster than hell and said quickly:

"Sorryfordisturbingyousir!"

Kiyone slammed the shoji door shut, which awakened both Orihime and Ichigo. Ichigo propped himself up on his elbow and grumbled as Orihime just sighed and stretched.

"What was that?" said the former.

"Don't know."

The two stood, extricating their bodies from each other's grasps. Ichigo just looked out of the window while Orihime took a comb out and ran it through her long locks which had become somewhat haphazard from last night.

Ichigo looked over his shoulder at her as she hummed a tune and brushed her hair. He cracked a grin at how she could just go on without thinking twice and not dwell too much on things. It was a strength he wished he had.

"Ichi-kun?" Orihime raised an eyebrow at his observation of her. He smirked at her use of a pet name for him.

"It's nothing."

XXXXX

Kiyone paced nervously as she awaited her Captain to exit with the Shinigami student. Damn, Kiyone hoped that Kurosaki-taichou wasn't angry at her for "intruding". This would fly around in no time.

"Kiyone." the shoji slid open to reveal Ichigo with Orihime behind him.

Immediately Kiyone bowed in apology.

"Sorry!"

"Nothing happened, so stop that."

"Er, uh, right." the vice-captain scratched her head as both Ichigo and Orihime sweat-dropped.

"Did you have something for me?"

"Yeah, it came last night."

Kiyone reached into her sleeve and handed Ichigo an envelope with a sakura symbol on it. It had to be from Shunsui if it had that on it.

"You're dismissed."

"Yessir." Kiyone bowed and left.

Ichigo took off the ribbon sealing the envelope and unfolded the letter within it. As he did so, Orihime slid her hand along her hair.

"I'll have to go Ichigo, see ya.

"Wait." Ichigo grabbed Orihime's arm as she turned to leave. She blinked several times and saw Ichigo put the letter into his sleeve. He turned to her, his eyes bittersweet: "There's someone I'd like you to meet."

XXXXX

Orihime had scarcely agreed to Ichigo having her skip classes to come with him when he decided to _Shyunpo_ the entire distance in a matter of seconds with her in his arms. Needless to say, it was a rather rigorous experience that was similar to being in a vacuum for a short period of time, being that it was so fast that not even air was felt.

They finally stopped outside a rather small house with a bamboo curtain over the entrance instead of a shoji door, like all other houses outside the Seireitei. Orihime turned her head over to Ichigo to get an answer from him.

"Ichi-"

"_She_ lives here."

Orihime raised an eyebrow at Ichigo's sentence, but recalled the emphasis he placed on "she". She looked at the small house, realizing that to have the Head Captain look this up was pretty drastic. Then again, this must mean a lot to Ichigo.

Ichigo slid his hand towards, but hesitated a bit. However, he saw that Orihime had placed her own hand over his.

"Don't be apprehensive, because something can vanish in that instant."

"Sorry."

Ichigo let Orihime guide his hand and push the curtain to the side. Ichigo let Orihime in first and then ducked his head under the curtain as they entered.

The house was as small on the inside as it was on the outside. Just a living with what looked like a storage room or two to the sides. Orihime darted her head left and right.

"Are you sure someone's here?"

"Yeah, I feel her."

Before the two could debate any further, someone came in from the other room; a woman with long, brown hair. She hummed a tune while she fiddled with a blanket she held in her hands.

She finally opened her eyes and looked to Ichigo and Orihime. She smiled.

"Hello, Ichi-chan."

Ichigo swallowed as Orihime hid behind him. He sweated a bit.

"H-hello, Mom."

Kurosaki Masaki smiled like Orihime would and set the blanket on a shelf on the wall. She fiddled with her yukata a bit and then looked at her son.

"You're not surprised?" Ichigo asked.

"No, I knew you'd want to see me if you decided to follow in Isshin's footsteps."

Ichigo sweat-dropped at his mother's attitude as she observed him. She squeezed his biceps with her hand, feeling their tautness.

"Are you eating well?"

"Yeah."

"You're tall, but you're all bones." Masaki looked right into Ichigo's eyes and observed his face "You should smile more, but you grew up handsome."

"I guess." Ichigo rubbed the back of his head.

Masaki smiled at her son's humility and then decided to look around his back at Orihime who had buried her face into Ichigo's spine. Masaki tapped Orihime's head to end her attempt to hide.

"May I ask who you are?"

"Um, Inoue, Inoue Orihime."

"I figured my Ichi-chan would bring home a princess!" Masaki giggled as both Orihime and Ichigo blushed crimson.

Masaki managed to yank Orihime off her son and observe the young girl from head to toe.

"Hmm, nice wide, strong hips, narrow waist, actually quite an athletic build if you don't count _these_." Masaki proceeded to grab Orihime's bosom shamelessly which surprised Orihime and caused Ichigo to sweat so much he could have watered the plants outside.

"Mom!"

"Hee-hee, I couldn't resist!"

_Did she and Dad's weird genes cancel each otherout when I was born?_

Masaki let out her giggles for the day and motioned for her son and Orihime to sit. Ichigo just crossed his legs while Orihime sat properly. Masaki sat as well and looked at Ichigo and Orihime.

"Well, I think you two look nice. You're perfect."

"Th-thank you, Masaki-san."

"Call me Mother."

Orihime blushed as did Ichigo. His mother sure did want couples to work fast. Masaki looked at Ichigo.

"So, why did you come here?"

"I just wanted to see you is all. Ever since Kyouraku became Head Captain I've had him looking for you."

"You missed me?"

Ichigo lowered his head.

"Yeah, I…I've missed you. Yuzu, Karin, and Dad missed you just as much as I did."

"Are they happy?"

"The last time I saw them, yeah. Yuzu has become the homemaker, Karin is a tough girl, and Dad is…Dad."

Masaki giggled at Ichigo's answers. However, Ichigo looked different.

"It was tough though, for Yuzu and Karin because they were so young and Dad…he hated that he couldn't save you that night."

"Tell the fool that he needs to learn not to worry so much anymore now that I'm here, and you shouldn't either."

Masaki placed her hands on Ichigo's shoulders and then held him close.

"I love you, Ichi-chan, so you can come anytime you want if you need something. I'll make tea next time."

Ichigo's eyes felt like they were burning and his heart felt heavy. But, it wasn't an unpleasant sensation. He didn't hesitate in hugging his mother.

"Mom, thank you."

Masaki chuckled and then looked to Orihime who had faced the other direction to give Ichigo and his mother some privacy. The older woman put her hand on the younger one's shoulder and gave a bit of a tug.

"Hime-chan, you made a good choice in him. I know he won't hurt you, or make you sad."

"Thank you, Mother."

"And…you have my blessing."

Orihime blushed and widened her eyes while Ichigo just adjusted his posture a bit. Orihime bowed her head respectfully.

"Th-thank you!"

Masaki stood and helped both her guests to their feet. She gave Ichigo the sort of smile Unohana used when she was reprimanding her subordinates.

"Ichi-chan, get this young lady to class now. And I believe you have duties as a captain to fulfill."

"Er, right. Uh, let's go, Orihime."

Ichigo scooped up Orihime and walked out. But his mother followed and had one last thing to say.

"Hime-chan."

Ichigo stopped and Orihime looked over his shoulder.

"Yes?"

"Take care of him and make sure that he smiles every day for you." Masaki grinned.

"I will, I promise."

Orihime looked to Ichigo whose face was on its default expression. He responded after a moment.

"What?"

"Can you?"

Ichigo looked at Orihime's waiting face and a slight smile appeared on its own. It wasn't huge, just enough to know that he was smiling and not forcing it.

Ichigo looked to his mother and showed her the same smile.

"I'll come again soon."

Ichigo vanished in an instant to go towards the Academy. Masaki looked at the spot Ichigo had been a second ago and didn't lose her smile.

"Live happy, don't hesitate, and know that there is always someone to hold you even if you're in despair."

XXXXX

Liner notes: Huh, I noticed that the chapters in this little fic funneled, the longest being the first chapter and the shortest being the last. I've come to realize over the days I worked on this finale that this is actually not a bad story, just different. I've never done a slice-of-life fic, but it turned out good.

Yeah, you can whine that the poem at the beginning is overused and maybe that Masaki showing up is boring, but that poem is still good and Ichigo hearing some words from his mother would give him solace if nothing else would.

Anyway, I think I've learned something from this project and I hope I can apply to everything else I do.


End file.
